dmanghis_khan

Cyanide & Happiness @ Explosm.net

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AWatc5U8RC4

best youtube clip ever.

glad to know i'm not the only one who knows how to treat a lady

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/gossip/sto...4p-383834c.html

He may have played nerdy eighth-grader Samuel (Screech) Powers in the sitcom "Saved by the Bell." But former TV geek Dustin Diamond can now take his place with Colin Farrell, Tommy Lee and Kid Rock as the star of his very own sex tape.

Everyone who remembers Diamond as a lovable putz is in for a shock once they see a 40-minute video in which he engages in a kinky three-way with two women, sources tell us.

We can't get too graphic here, but word is that the action includes some bodily functions and an act known as a "Dirty Sanchez."

Phoenix-based agent David Hans Schmidt, who has brokered some of Hollywood's biggest celebrity-skin deals, confirms that he's acquired the rights to a tape featuring Diamond.

"Just when you think you have seen everything in this business," he tells us, "mankind has raised the bar another notch. Or lowered it."

Schmidt is in L.A., shopping the tape to Hustler's Larry Flynt, Vivid's Steven Hirsch and other major distributors of adult video.

Now age 29, the 6-foot Diamond is much brawnier than you may remember him. He's a black belt in karate, and, four years ago, he defeated Ron Palillo (Horshack on "Welcome Back, Kotter") on Fox's "Celebrity Boxing 2."

Diamond's manager, Roger Paul, said his client has become a successful standup comic and will appear on the ABC sitcom "The Knights of Prosperity."

"I haven't seen the tape," Paul told us. "I've heard rumors. Dustin has been trying to escape the Screech typecast. So this may help me get more bookings."

In 1996, former "Saved by the Bell" sweetheart Elizabeth Berkley bared all in the Paul Verhoeven-Joe Eszterhas trashterpiece, "Show Girls."

The sex vid's working title is "Saved by the Smell." Ewwwww.

Visiting Purchase was definitely a success, I missed everyone that I saw alot. I still do.

I decided to come back that weekend Jami and Paige are visiting. I hope you all don't get sick of me.

We worked really hard editing and putting this altogether (which is rather sad given the subject at hand)

Without further ado...The masturbation video!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sw4W3rPTxBU


I am actually extremely proud of this and i'm not sure what that says about me as a human being, and i don't really care all that much either.

alright, I haven't updated anything substantial in a while so I guess i can write out how the working life is going.

I got hired at target to do overnight signing which I was told was just taking down old signs and prices and putting new ones up (which i thought would be incredibly boring/easy) I go there and the second i get there this fat black guy is like "Nigga come with me." than he asks if its my first day and i say yeah and he says "Aight, yo...In the freezer." Me and this other new kid are in the freezer for 6 hours, on a giant ladder throwing down ice cream and other shit without jackets. so we finally get out and all these old spanish men are smiling at us and i think to myself maybe God does exist and I am allowed to leave this freezing deathbed. no such luck.


They tell us both to take three boxes each and run as fast as we can down the corridor and back the first one to go there and back to where they started is the victor. The first "race" I won. and this old spanish guy hugs me and tells me I just won him two hundred dollars and asks if i'd like to sniff blow in the bathroom with him. I decline because my nose is frostbitten, and he waves it in my face to taunt me.

so after, i finally got out at like 9:30 in the morning (I started at 10 at night) I felt like a pussy pre-school student after his first day at school I was all like "Mommy, I can't go back! the other kids are so mean/coke-addicted/no habla ingles" and she understood, so i went to human resources adn she said i was supposed to be trained at signing but they messed up and didn't want to waste 8 hours of training time having me learn something else so I told her they just wasted those 8 hours anyway and walked away. I felt like a badass until I realized i was now unemployed again.

That was my one night stand with Target.

Now, I'm working at FYE in the mall. Compared to the last job, I feel like i'm working at Willy Wonka's candy shop. I mean I get my fair share of disgruntled goth kids and gangsta wannabes, but it sure beats the freezer.

Fuck Freezers.
Fuck Boxes.
Fuck Ladders.
Fuck Target.

Cindy Sheehan is starving herself to protest the war in Iraq.

Maybe she can convince Ann Coulter to protest her protest by starving herself

Two dead attention whores, America would definitely improve instantly

Thanksgiving and 4th of july are both bullshit...

That statement is true, as is this...

Pointing that out is cliche, repetitive and over done.
while we are exposing unseen truths , Nixon was corrupt and Hitler was a bit of an extremist.

I'll drench my Turkey with Indian blood and gravy, you can drench yours with injustice and obviousness.

Happy Holidays.

Kobiashi new world record!
54 hot dogs!

Nice try joey chestnut, you almost brought the cardboard belt to the old USA, valiant effort.
I think the funniest thing, was that in the rulebook for the contest if you vomit they call it "reversal of fortune" how do they think this stuff up?

Kobiashi gets much respect from D-manghis. The man is a machine. I don't think i know 5 people combined that could eat that much.

Happy 4th of july everyone! Hope you all have a good time with family/friends

http://arts.guardian.co.uk/news/story/0,,1785103,00.html

One of France's most popular rappers will appear in court today charged with offending public decency with a song in which he referred to France as a "slut" and vowed to "piss" on Napoleon and Charles de Gaulle. Monsieur R, whose real name is Richard Makela, could face three years in prison or a €75,000 (£51,000) fine after an MP from the ruling UMP party launched legal action against him over his album Politikment Incorrekt.

Article continues
In the video for the song FranSSe, Makela, 30, appeared dressed as a gendarme with two naked women rubbing against the French flag as he rapped: "France is a bitch, don't forget to fuck her till she's exhausted/You have to treat her like a slut, man." At another point in the song, he sang: "I piss on Napoleon and on General de Gaulle."

When Daniel Mach, MP for Pyrénées-Orientales, heard the album last year, he proposed a law making it a criminal offence to insult the dignity of France and the French state. In November, when riots broke out in France's run-down suburbs, another UMP deputy, François Grosdidier, won the support of 152 MPs and 49 senators who demanded that parliament act against Makela's lyrics. But by then Mr Mach had taken a personal action against Makela for making and disseminating "violent and pornographic messages" to which minors could get access.

The case is the latest in a series of stand-offs between conservative MPs and rappers. In 2003, Nicolas Sarkozy, the interior minister and presidential hopeful, brought a criminal case against the rap band Sniper, saying their music was anti-semitic, racist and insulting. In one song, La France, they called France a "bitch". The case was thrown out of court last year.

The same lawyer who defended Sniper is acting for Makela.

Makela, who was born in Belgium and came to France aged 14, told Le Parisien he did not target any particular group but rapped against "the system". "You can have a critical view of the French state without being anti-French or racist."


Freedom of speech= Good
Pissing on Napoleon= Funny
French government= Fascists




FREE Monsieur R!

I gotta say i got really into this, its really fucked up/morbidly fascinating

It's a website with newsstories of a person's death with a link to the dead person's myspace. One that I found really interesting was a man who strangled and raped his girlfriend to death and if you go on his myspace from her is a comment saying
"Happy Birthday Honey! You're finally 21!! I will make sure that your birthday party is great! Love you!

-jess"

There is also a dead model who died in a car accident who people still hit on, on her myspace page.

well anyway the website is
http://www.mydeathspace.com/deaths.aspx

it's really fascinating.

and just to secure my place in hell i'll ask the question everyone is wondering

....Does god have a top 8?

Fuck psychology of emotion such an unbearably hard class.

who honestly gives a shit about the psychology of facial expressions
(I'm making a scowl)

The adrenaline flowed in my arteries like the grease of a 1000 big macs once did...

It was time, I extracted revenge on those same golden arches that once had provided me with stability, happiness and bad cholestral.

Me, Matt and Raffi had concocted the plan a long time ago (Well okay, I concocted the plan and they nodded like they were in the precense of a headcase).

Raffi, was the most apprehensive of all. "Dave, what are you thinking?"
"I don't know about this dude."
"They have cameras"
"The popo love fast food."

But to no avail...The plan would be put into effect.

Matt's car crept into that faithful west islip drive thru and i heard an old woman's voice come through the speakers.

"Hello, May I take your order"

It was do or die. Matt looked at me, and shook his head like he didn't believe I had the testicular fortitude capable for such a task.

Than... Deep inside my potbelly I heard a voice struggling to make its way up to my throat...It was the voice of rebellion.

"Hello Sir?! May I take your order"

"Yes. Can i get a... FUCK YOU!"

Silence. Silence.

I had just destroyed the spirit of the golden arches and the woman from "Murder she wrote" with two words.


Matt laughed really hard and I had to almost smack him in the head to provoke movement of the vehicle.

With the deed done, we parked far away and met up with Raffi who was far away from the scene and the "popo"...We described our accomplishment

I was going to order a double-cheeseburger but i was already full...with success.

(I went inside and got a hamburger anyway)

between this video and beastility how can anyone not found the internet amazing

http://www.youtube.com/w/American-Idol-5---Las-Vegas---Ryan-Heart?v=JD_vn1G9C5c&search=%20american%20idol


AMERICAN HxC HARDCORE IDOL

I had forgotten how boring purchase really is.

4 more months of this

Definition of LiveJournal...............

A contradiction in terms. A journal that really isn't a journal, created in a place that really doesn't exist, written by people that shouldn't be allowed to write, and written about things nobody important (or sane) really cares about.

A stinking dung heap of adolescent attention whores and their respective attention pimps.

A diseased conglomeration of ignorant savages resembling in some twisted way a society.

The Warsaw Ghetto of online communities. Thousands of innocent minds find their way here to waste away into degenerate lumps of fecal matter. Spelling, grammar, or anything remotely resembling intelligence is extinguished before it infects the rest of the rotting hive of parasitic subhumans.

Dreams, aspirations, plans, goals, happiness, optimism, and religion are also prohibited. Only suicide, depression, and bitterness reside therein.

A morbidly fascinating collection of dysfunctional relationships, disappointing underachievers, antisocial xenophobes, and well… total failures.

A place where creativity fountains forth like a glorious plume of Technicolor vomit, drowning originality in a sea of sickness and depravity.

Home for those who have no right to damage the human gene pool with their inability to control their wanton desires. The subject of procreation, or at least half of the process, is so rampantly available here that nearly 90% of all entries are in some way related to it. A male dog in a room full of neutered bitches would have less to say on the subject.

A place were light is swallowed entirely by the overwhelming darkness.




wordd to that.

1. name:
2. birthday:
3. place of residence:
4. what makes you happy:
5. what are you listening to now/have listened to last:
6. do you read my lj:
7. if you do, what is particularly good/bad about it:
8. an interesting fact about you:
9. are you in love/have a crush at the moment:
10. favorite place to be:
11. favorite lyric:
12. best time of the year:

RECOMMEND
1. a film:
2. a book:
3. a band, a song and an album:

PLUS
1. one thing you like about me:
2. two things you like about yourself:
3. give me your myspace & aim s/n:
4. put this in your lj so i can tell you what i think of you.

http://www.gaypasg.org/GayPASG/PressClippings/2006/Jan/Cowboys%20Are%20My%20Weakness.htm


hahaha i love you larry david.

Fucking Giants.

Alright, let's get down to business and past all the congratulatury "Happy" new year bullshit.

June 6th, 2006 comes once a millenium ladies and gentlemen what does this mean?

three words... Book of Revelations.

666 baby!

Maybe the airwaves will be corrupted by Slayer and Iron Maiden once again.

Or maybe Satan takes the sinners screaming downward with him.


either way hope the new year goes good for everyone (half of it anyway.)